Friday, May 11, 2012

Surviving another Mother's Day

Dear friends, it's almost Mother's Day. If you're anything like me, you hate this day. It's all about mothers, and you are not a mother. People who don't know you assume that you look like a mother and must be one, and that makes it hurt all the more. Everywhere you turn, you see tributes to "Mom," advertisements for gifts and special activities for "Mom" and people planning family get-togethers to honor "Mom." You might even be hosting or attending one of these events this weekend. I'm sorry. I'll be leading the choir at two Masses at church on Sunday morning, so I'll get to experience the Mother's Day prayers and the after-Mass brunch twice. Then I'll go home to my dog.

For me, Mother's Day is not as bad as it used to be. For a while, especially after my mother died, the whole thing turned me into a raging crazy woman. I used to expect cards and gifts from the stepchildren, and that didn't happen. I get it. They have their own mother and grandmother to honor. It's just a tough day.

To survive, I urge you to avoid as much of the Mother's Day mania as you can. Do something that makes you feel good, preferably far away from mass media. If you can't, try to focus your energy on honoring people you love. Try not to obsess about what you don't have.Think of Mother's Day like Father's Day or Secretaries Day or Brussell's Sprouts Appreciation Day. It has nothing to do with you, so let it go.

And here's another antidote, shameless plug intended: Childless by Marriage, the Kindle ebook, is available now as at Amazon.com. You don't have to have a Kindle to read it. You can download the Kindle reading program for free on any computer or smart-phone and most tablets such as the iPad. So curl up with a book and ignore the craziness until Mother's Day goes away. You might want to skip ahead to the chapter called Mother's Day Rant.

The print book will be out this summer, but you can read the ebook today for only $2.99.

Another antidote: Feel free to rant about Mother's Day here in the comments all you want.  We're here for you.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking the " M word " Day will be the practically prefect day to take a long field trip to Costco while all the everybody elses will be in churches or in restaurant lines. There is a method to my childless not by choice madness.

Sue Fagalde Lick said...

Costco! Sounds good to me. Time to stock up in peace on meat, muffins and everything else. Have fun.

Jossalyn said...

I built a chicken run for my hand-raised chicks on Mother's Day! It's the best I can do until my stepdaughter loans me her Kindle. :D

Sue Fagalde Lick said...

I wound up playing music outside until I couldn't play anymore--and I was sunburned. Then the dog and I took a long walk. I hadn't expected to get as depressed as I did on Mother's Day. The church services were difficult, and everything reminded me of the triple losses of my husband, my mother, and the children I never had. But today is a new day, and I'm okay.

Anonymous said...

I'm a little late on this one but in case there are other people who read all the posts at once every few months I'll throw it in anyway. The best place to go on mother's day, or any family focused holiday that you feel left out of is Las Vegas, or Atlantic City..anyplace with casinos. You never see families or kids there especially around that time. I know thats not everybody's thing but whether I actually gamble or not being there makes me feel young and fun instead of lonely and left out.

Sue Fagalde Lick said...

Great idea, Anonymous.