Follini includes a whole chapter on what to do if you want a child but your partner doesn’t. Often it isn’t that the partner has made a clear decision against children but that he keeps putting it off or won’t talk about it. It may also be that the relationship has other problems. Or perhaps the one who wants children has not been clear about what she wants and needs. Follini asks questions to help people sort this out. Is he firm in his decision not to have children? Will you stay with him anyway or will you leave in the hope of finding someone else who is willing to be a parent? The answers may be difficult to face, but in the end, it might be better to know than not so you can make a decision and move on.
I have long maintained that couples need to talk about this issue in depth, not in quick asides and assumptions. I didn't do that. Too insecure to stand up for myself, I let the men in my life make the decision by default. Don't do what I did. Figure it out before you run out of eggs.