Monday, August 27, 2007

Welcome to the Childless by Marriage blog

I have resisted doing this blog for a while because I should be working on my book by this title, but so many women have contacted me and visited the "Childless resources" page on my web site that it seems like a conversation that is dying to happen. People can't wait until I get the book behind covers. Plus thoughts and happenings keep coming up that don't/won't fit into a book or an article. So let's blog a bit. I admit up front that I am a professonal writer doing books and articles on the childless thing, and I promise I will not use your comment without your permission. That said, here's my situation:

I have been married twice. Husband number one didn't want children, although he didn't tell me that until a few years in. It was always wait till he finishes college, wait till he gets a good job, wait till we buy a house. Then there came a time when I thought I might be pregnant, and his tune changed to: if you have a baby, I'm leaving. Ouch. I wasn't pregnant, but it didn't work out anyway. Husband number two, a wonderful older man who already had three children, didn't want any more kids. He had had a vasectomy. I thought he might change his mind, but he didn't. So now I have just reached menopause with no kids of my own and three steps I'm not close to. I regret not having children, but at the same time I know that I have done a lot of things in my life that I could not have done if I were a mother.

So that's the deal. Missed my chance, but maybe that's what God had in mind for me.

I'll be sharing stories, statistics, comments, etc., here. I welcome you to join me. Be forewarned that I don't consider myself "childfree." I'm "childless." There's a difference.

IMPORTANT NOTICE: This blog has moved. Please switch over to the new site at All of the old posts have already been transferred over there, and it would make life easier if you would comment at that site. Thank you.


Cortney said...

I'm so glad to have fond your blog- finally a women who is the EXACT situation I find my self in now. My husband and I have been been together for 10 years, married for 3. He was always reluctant to have kids, but promised to have a child with me because he loved me. About a month ago, shortly after a pregnancy "scare" he finally came clean and admitted that he lied and that he does not want kids. So I'm in the early stages of it and I don't want to leave him and throw 10 years away to start over. I look forward to reading your blog and finding others who know what I'm going through. Thank YOU!

Suelick said...

Welcome, Cortney. I hope we can help you through this.